Today, as I halfway paid attention
to some Facebook posts,
I noticed I had an email. I checked
the message, and I was
COMPLETELY blown away by the
message. It was sent to
my sister, Susie and I from a
"girl" (now woman with a son of her own)
that previously attended my father's little
Lutheran church in
Commerce, Texas...so many years ago.
I took a picture of the
pansies I planted yesterday in memory of my
mother, and posted
it to Facebook. Fifteen years after her death,
I'm still amazed at
the amazing impact my mother had on
the lives of so many. It
simply takes my breath away. I'm not
one to rant "religious" things
in my posts because I, honestly, disagree with
a lot of the hatred
and intolerance that is sometimes put out
there in the name of God. MY
GOD is a tolerant, kind, loving, and forgiving
God. Anyway, what I lean toward
is SPIRITUALITY more than religion, and
BEING the change I want
to see in the world. Sometimes, I feel that
the hypocrisy of some
"Christians" is more
intolerant, inflexible, and judgmental than my
FORGIVING, TOLERANT, LOVING God. What I love
is when a person
BEHAVES as Jesus behaved. I guess that's why I
like the whole
"Love is a verb" statement. When
someone IS THE VERB...by acts
of DOING...that, in my humble opinion...not
just sitting in a pew on
Sunday morning...is having a
personal, authentic relationship with God.
And then there's folks like my mother...one of
those phenomenal ladies
who was the whole package...Christian in every
good sense of the word,
tolerant, graceful, honorable, the
whole package...inside and out.
She was the verb, 150 percent. I
left off the name of my childhood
friend that sent this message to me,
in order to protect her privacy.
Below is her message. It simply means the
world to me and I never
want to forget. THIS, folks...is LEGACY...
Hey Ladies, I hope this email finds
you all well! Brenda, your post about
your mom reminded me that I needed to email
you girls about something
that happened a long time ago, but that I
still think about often.
When we were young, and Jeff (my
oldest brother - not sure if you
all remember) was having some
serious mental difficulties, he attempted
suicide more than once. To say that
was an extremely difficult thing for
my family to go through is an incredible
understatement, and to say
that we dealt with tremendous confusion, pain,
shame, etc. would be
putting it in a very mild form. Those years
shaped me, in ways both good
and bad, and still do today.
As a young girl, in a small town
where people loved to gossip, you
can imagine some of the things I
heard about my family. Tough stuff
for a young tween to experience. I recall
specifically, one day I had
overheard someone saying something
particularly disturbing about my
parents, and your mom pulling me aside,
bending down to my level and saying,
"P, you are a bright and beautiful young
woman, you have absolutely nothing
whatsoever to be ashamed of, your brother is
going to be okay and we are going
to help pray for him. Don't ever forget
that." I never, ever did.
She also cooked meals for my mom
during that time, when nobody
else in the community did, and often stopped
in to check on her.
I know that years later my parents
chose to leave the church – for
whatever reasons they never told me, and
honestly, I could care
less about - but I remember my mom always
reflecting on how kind
your mother was to us during those
days. I never heard either of them
say a negative word about your
parents, and I will always consider Trinity
Lutheran my church. In fact, the example your
mom set for me has helped
me to reach out to other women in my
community, particularly during difficult
times, and somehow come up with the right
thing to say.
I know this is very random, and
deeply personal, but I just wanted to let
you all know. She is still alive. I think she lives through us all by the
way her kind actions shaped us. She was truly
a wonderful woman.
May
God Bless you both - much love
